I don't know. Whaddaya' think?
Tis', tisn't it?
Alpha Grandma left today, and I'm bored.
And more than a little moody.
Remind me again how I ended up in this situation where I'm forever saying goodbye to people I love very, very dearly indeed; often with no hope of seeing said loved ones for a good year or more.
Don't say for love of Mister, because it just ain't cuttin' it tonight.
It's not that I want to go home with her, because I don't.
And it's not that I desperately want her to stay, because clearly she was ready to go home. She was ready for some peace and quiet. I respect that. We were both ready to have our respective spaces back. She'll respect that.
It's kind of like I have no anchor without my extended family around me. I spend 98% of my life absently adrift, 5,000 miles away from my safe harbor. Then, once a year or so, for this all too brief interlude, I get pulled in and lovingly surrounded by my people--people who've known me forever, and speak my language, and love me because they have to on account of the blood and all. But then, very abruptly, I'm cut loose again. And even though I know this adopted place of mine--I'm comfortable here, reasonably safe, and wildly loved by my own small brood--I can't help but feel miserably alone and completely misunderstood so far away from the people and places who raised me.
I feel this riduclous metphor most keenly immediately after a departure. And let me add this, it's much, much worse to be the one left behind than to be the one leaving. Something I don't always appreciate because it's usually me doing the leave-taking.
In just over a week my dad and step-mom will be coming for a visit. They too will leave me in their turn.
Again, I say MEH!
Self-pitying ennui. I'm a master at it. Pour me onto a sofa in a dimly lit room, and crack open the wine. I may be here awhile.
In the meantime, let me know what you think of my new masthead. I was just futzing around a little. I can give it another whirl, if this one doesn't suit.