Thursday, March 29, 2007

In Which I Resist the Urge To Say, "Long Time No Blog"

For the record, I don't owe you people any excuses! It's my blog. I can abandon it when I want to.

Not that I wanted to. I've actually had things to say. Gripping things about life and the weather, and what a soulless, rancorous bitch Missy is. Really important shit, that you, as my captive, eagar audience, need to know.

But alas, other, more pressing matters got in the way. Hard to say exactly what. Honestly, I forget. But I'm sure it had something to do with that heartless, hard-headed, obstinate mule of a harpy-aping daughter of mine. That surly, uncompromising, head-strong, wilful little I'll-move-when-I-bloody-well-feel-like-it-and-not-a-second-sooner-you-spineless-impotent-old-hag wee whippersnapper with whom I've been engaging in open hostilities for the better part of a month now.

Pfft. The Terrible Two's. As if. Hard-hitting, urban warfare with sippy grenades and minion troops of Fisher Price Little People more like. I've been through this battle twice before, so I've got experience on my side. But Jesus God! She is orders of magnitude scrappier than my other two opponents! Our stand-offs bring to mind the scene in that awful King Arthur movie of a few years back, where the Stellan SkaarsgĂ„rd character finally meets Arthur before the final battle and walks away muttering, "Finally, a man worth killin'." That's Missy and I. It's do-or-die. We fight to the death.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

The Union Will Stand Afterall

It was my birthday Friday.

In an attempt to redress the Valentine's Rose Fiasco of a few weeks ago, Mister conjured these beauties from the dusty ruins of our once romantic past.

Red this time, for passion. There was a shiny diamond and emerald ring involved too.

Psst I think he still likes me

Thursday, March 01, 2007

More Evidence That I Totally Rule

This is what my pulse watch does when I meet my exercise goals for the week.
I win!
Sure, it's never happened before. But now that I know, it's so going to happen more often.