Saturday, December 20, 2008

From The File Marked 'Want'

I'm not a shoe person.  I have a total of maybe 10 pairs--not including my two pairs of running shoes, which I consider something more like necessary equipment than stylish footwear. 

The black strapy heels that I wore to the million dollar wedding I bought 11 years ago to go with a dress I wore on my honeymoon.  Jillybaby had a very minor stroke when she heard this.  Then she made me buy a pair of black ankle boots to wear to the million dollar cocktail party the night before the million dollar wedding. 

"They're very now," she said, "Very practical.  You'll get loads of use out of them."

So I bought the black ankle boots--even though they looked almost exactly like a pair of black ankle boots I wore when I was in the 7th grade--a place I swore I would never revisit--and in doing so, I fear I may have awoken something primeaval in my nature.  Something carnal.  Something drooling.  Something controlled not by reason or logic, but by pure, unadulterated, craven lust.

'Want' does not even begin to describe my desire for these boots:

I can't explain it.  I just.....I really just.....oh God, I'm not sure I can live without them.

Can someone please explain to me why all the pretty shoes cost more than $200?


Queen LaTeacha said...

I think the gene lies deep within all possessors of the X chromosome.
You may very well have awakened a monster. But $200?? Get control of yourself, you fool!

skinny bitch's mom said...

It really is genetic,. You are sooooo related to me. However, the most I ever paid for a pair is $47 and that was 20 years ago. I've been told I must be related to Imelda.

JEDA said...

No, no, no....

You two are not doing this right. Look at the boots. Really, really look at them.

And then tell me YES! I really MUST! have them cost be damned.

Jilly, help me out them how it's done.

jillybaby said...

Listen Doll, you MUST buy these boots. What you must always remember is that you can NEVER have enough pairs of shoes. Take me, for example - on one hand I can pay $200 or more for such items of lust but on the other hand, I paid just $12 for a pair of Chanel style green patent pumps. It's not about the money, it's about the shoes and your desire to have them.

My philosophy has always been 'it's not what you wear, it's how you wear it'.

So back to these boots. The fact that you have posted a blog entry about them just emphasises your desire for them. Surely you can't be blamed for the ridiculous Norwegian prices can you? The taxes have never stopped you buying wine have they? And think of the uses for such items of fancy...

You can wear them like forever! Ok so that's about it but shit they're boots, what else can you do with them!

Oooooo Oooooooo you could put them on your pillow so Mister thinks you're a 'normal' couple!!! (cheap shot but pretty funny you gotta admit).


Tif said...

Ewwww, those are pretty!! You DO need them.