It's been a while since I shared any of Elder Miss's daft yet oh-so earnest truisms.
So without further ado:
"Mom, you are my greatest love. Without you I would die. But don't ever tell my friends that I kiss you."
"Boy! You always get it wrong! If it's two foots, it's feet. If it's just one feet, it's foot. Get it right now, k'?"
And finally, this, which I found stuffed in one of the three dozen notebooks she keeps scattered around the house:
Which reminds me--Alpha Grandma, as far as my memory serves, you didn't read my diary. You read a spiral notebook you found while helping me clean out my desk. And clearly, snooping through notebooks is part of the job description. Stop beating yourself up already. You're off the hook.