"Mom, I spilled some spaghetti."
"Oh good, Boy! That's just great. Because, you know, I spent the whole afternoon cleaning, and the floors were so spotless and shiny. And I know how none of you feel very comfortable or at ease when the house is actually clean, so it's just as well, really, that it only took 30 minutes for someone to spill something. Now everyone can just go ahead and feel right at home. Brilliant! No, seriously. That's just great!"
He stares at me blankly. Squints a bit, then chews his lip as he reexamines his mess. Clearly something does not add up. Finally he adds, "No, Mom. I mean I spilled on the floor."